Forgive and yet not forget
One of the conversations that i vividly remember having with G over a particularly stressful period in the lives of S, C, G & me was over the concept of forgiving and forgetting. And then again the same thing came up a few years ago when i was having some other issues in my life. The whole point of debate between us was what it really meant to forgive.. did it really have to be that you should forget when you forgive or is it possible to forgive and yet not forget?
As with many other things in life (I like to believe) I am more of an optimist in translating ideal situations into pragmatic ones. I firmly believe that a guy and a girl can be the best of friends.. at least as good friends if not better than any two people with the same anatomy. I also believe that it is possible to truly move on with your relationship after one of you has cheated on the other (sure i might not have completely succeeded in it when i had tried, but I sure was almost where I wanted to be!). Sure neither of these or any of the other situations are easy to achieve, but they surely are achievable.
As for the topic at hand, I think the only way to forgive someone is actually without forgetting the deed/incident. It is quite a simple thing to understand really. If you want to look at it logically, then if you are forgetting, there really is no need to forgive. No, really..
Girl: ‘Oh i’m sooo sorry honey for not doing anything special for your birthday’
Boyfriend after forgetting: ‘Umm, dint you do something? I thought you did’
There you go.. no need for forgiveness at all! 
So yeah, when you’re faced with a situation when you need to forgive someone.. don’t try and forget the mistake, you know that your brain is like a kid.. the more you tell it to not do something, the more it does it! So unless you are Guy Pearce and need tattoos, don’t even try it. And then of course what doesn’t kill you, only makes you stronger.
yeah well.. thats all that the insomniac in me has to offer for tonight… see ya’ll later.
*in case you are wondering what prompted this topic for the post, it was far from a personal issue.. it was actually a ‘joke’ on a user-contribution site of humor that got me thinking 
April 21, 2009 at 12:15 pm
I like your new header and theme!
As for your topic I totally get what you’re saying. About forgetting something and then not needing to forgive.
I however find it really hard to forgive and forget. Really hard, I tend to hold grudges even though I try really hard not to. I eventually get over it but it stays with me for a while.
As for past relationships they’ve always ended rather amicably so I was able to stay friends with them. When I started dating J he disliked the closeness a relationship (even when it ended) brings, and brought to me. I really did love them all (not that there were a bajillion you understand. lol) but couldn’t jeopardize my relationship with him, which I would have done had I kept on seeing them.
I miss them to tell you the truth. They were good guys.
April 22, 2009 at 3:40 pm
it is sad to see old friends and people that were close to you, leave you for whatever reason. And i’m sure at some turn in your life you’ll bump into some or even all of those bajillion
ppl and things might work out even with J’s consent (now that you guys are so much further into ur relationship).